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'-D.4‘:VJD< OOPPERFIELDZ I ' e 131:
I sat listeningifora long while, butithere Vwassnbtia I
sound. I crawled'up' from the lloor,‘,andTsaw my face
in the glass, so sWollen,,red, and nglyV‘t'haty'it almost ‘ ‘
frightened. me. ‘ lily.’ stripes lwerehsore and‘ stiti; fund
made"m‘e cry afres ;’ when‘ I movcd';' but they ' were
nothing to the guilt I felt. , It laypheavier on‘my breast
than if I had been a most atrocious’ criminal,’ I dare say.
z.,It‘had began, to'gr'ow dark,’ andvl had shut the window
(I had been lying,‘ for the most part‘,;with my head upon‘
the sill, by turns ,crying,'dozing,[and‘ looking listlessly
out), when the key was turned; and‘ Miss Murdstone '
camein with.sorne bread“and‘meat,“and rnilki These
she ut down upon‘ the table’ without agword, glaring at
me the while with exemplary firmness; and‘then retired,-
locking thedoor aft'er‘herL ‘ ‘ ",’ ', "",‘ “ "‘
Long after it was‘d ’rk' I sat’ there, wonderingiwhether
anybody else would com'c'., VYhen"this‘appeared ipm-‘
probable for that night,‘ I undressed ‘and"‘went';to' bed ;
and there, I began towonder‘ fcarfully WI1l1t‘TV0llId be
done to me. lVhcther.it’ was a‘ eriminaljact that I had
committed? “Whether I should ',be takeninto custody,
and sent to prison? Whether I‘,Was atall‘ in danger’ of
beinghanged? - ‘ " “ ' “'“ '
I never shall forget thewaking, next, mornin ; the
heinv cheerful and fresh for the first moment,‘ an ‘then
the being welghed‘do1vri‘ h tl1e stale and disrna1'dp-
pression of remembrance.‘ "hIiss’Murdstone ‘reappeared’
before I was out of bed; told me,‘ in so many;words,
that I was free to walk in the garden‘for half an hour
:
and no longer ;. and retired, lcavingthe door open,’ that ‘
I mirrht’avail myself of "that permission.’ "' g
I id so,’ and did'so‘,every morningof ‘ my imprison-V
meat, which lasted five, days. ‘ If I‘ could have‘ seen my‘
mother’ alone, I should have gone down on gmyjknecs to
her and besought her forgiveness ; but I‘saw no, one;
Miss Murdstone excepted, during the’ ‘whole‘tirne'-f-ex-
cept at evening prayers in the ‘parlour ; to which”IVw‘as
escorted by Miss‘ Murdstone"after ev'e‘rybody.elsefwas
placed; ‘where’ I was ‘stationed; a" youngfoutlaw; all
alone by ' myself near ;the" door; and" whence Lwas
solemnly conductedby myygjailer, before’ any one arose
from the devotional’ posture. ‘ I only observed fthat my
mother was asfar oil from me as she could be,’ and kept
her face another way so that I never saw it ;'and"that'
Mr. Murdstone’s hand‘was’bound up in,‘a,‘large' linen
Wrapper. -. . . p , g‘ ., 1,, ,: ‘,z,., x,’
The length of those five days I can convey no l(1ea.:‘0f,
to an .one. They occupy the place of ‘years’ in‘, my re-
mem mines.’ The wi1yin[whlcli I listened to all‘the in-
cidents ot‘ tho"house';that‘,mado themselves, a'udible"‘to
me; the ringing of bells, the opening’ and shutting of
doors,’the murmuring"of‘voices,‘ the ‘footsteps on the
stairs; to any laughing, whistling,‘ or ‘singing, outside,‘
which seemedmore disrnalthan anything else to me in
my solitude and disgrace-,-the uncertain ace of the
hours, especially at'night,;when I would ‘wa 'e ‘thinking
it was 1nornin‘g’,.and'find thatthe ‘fatnllywero not yet
gone to bed, ‘and that allthe length otnight‘ had yet to
come-the depressed dreams and nightmares] had-the
return of day, noon, afternoon,’ evening; when the boys
played in the churchyard, and I watched 'them ‘from a
istance within theroom,‘ being ashamed to show myself
at the windowlest they should know I was a prisoner-
the strange sensation,of never hearing myself speak-
the fleeting intervals I of something‘ like cheerfulness,
which came with‘ eating and drinking,‘ andfwent awa
with it-thesettlng in of rain one evcningywitli a"t‘re's 1'
smell, and its coming down faster and ‘faster between
me and tho'church‘, until itaud gathering night seemed
to quench me in gloom, andvfear, ‘and remorse‘-all this
appears to have gone round and round. for ‘years’ instead
of days, it is so vividly andstrongly stamped on my re-'
membrance. ' ’ ' ‘ I ,7‘ " ' " ',
On the lastlnight of my restraint,‘ I was awakened by
hearing my own name spoken‘in‘ a whisper.‘ I started
up in bed, and putting out my arms in tho dark,,said :
"Is that you, Peggottyt? ' ‘ ' ' ‘ ,
There was no immediate answer, but presently Iheard
my name again, in a toneso very mysterious and "awful,-
that I think I should have gone into a fit, it‘ it had‘ not
plceurred to me that it must have come through the keyi
o e: ' ' ' ' ‘V
I groped my way to the door, and putting myown lips
to the keyhole’, whisperodn T ;w 1 . . . 2! 1,. -.
“ Is that you, Peggotty,‘ dear? ” “
soft as a mouse,’ or the Cat’ll hear us.”- ' wt 1'' ..
Iunderstood this to" mean 'Miss Murdstone, and was.
sensible ofntho urgency of -the case ';“ her roomzbeing
closeby.“ g .. I ;'.,,,..,5.: .. .3 '
y ‘,‘ Ilow‘s mama,-de'arvPeggotty? -Is' shelvery angry.
.‘VItI1‘Il’lO?”-" -‘I 3 -wl:’.Hi 3.!‘ iv. 12-. W:
I could hear Peggotty crying softly. on her side of ‘the’
keyhole, as I?was doing onimine,‘ before she answered..'
“No. Not vern” , T?-;1?: , . 31
, “ Vvhnt is going to be done‘ with me, Peggotty, dear?
‘ Do you‘know?"--
5 “ School.’ Near London,” was Peggotty’s answer. If
was obliged to get‘ her to repeat it,’ for she.'spoke :it the?
first time quite down my throat, in 'consequenc'e of 2' my:
having forgotten to take my mouth away‘frorn Y the '' key-
hole’ and put myear there ; and though her words tickled
me a good-‘deal,’ 1‘didn’t hearthem.‘ . . ,2: I . .
“ lVhen, Peggotty ‘I ” ,
‘‘To-morrow.’' ‘ vi - g -.,,t “’ -
.“Is that the reason-why Miss "Murdstone tooktho
clothes out of my 'drawers?f’ which she had done,,thougli:
I have forgotten to mention it
“ Yes,” said Peggotty.-7“ Box.”
“ Shan’t I see mama?"
“Yes,” said Peggotty. “ Mornin .”
Then Peggotty fitted her mouth close to the keyhole,
and delivered these words‘ through it with as much feel-
ing and earnestness as a keyhole has ever been the me-
dium of communicating, I will venture to assert : shoot-
ing in each broken littleysentence in 9. convulsive little
burst ofits own.-'v“‘-H ‘> wit ‘ 2 H .
- “ Davy,-' dear.‘ If I ain’trbeen azackly as intimate withi
you. Lately, as I used to‘ be. It ain’t ‘because I don’t.
love you. ' ust aswell and more, my pretty poppet. It's
becausel thoughtit better for you. ;-And for some one.
else besides. ‘- Davy; my‘d2h-ling; are you listening? Can’
youhear?” v V y . =- ‘- , ‘ ’
'- “ Ye‘,-‘yes’-ye-yes. Peggotty! '3. I sobbe'd.. .
I “ M own !” said Peggctty,"wlth infinite compassion.
“What I wan’t to say, is.'. That you must never forget
me. 7For I’ll never forget you.’ And If11.taJ;e as much’
care ‘of-your mama, Davy. As I ever took of you. ' And
Ivwon’t leave her; ‘ The day may eomelwhen she’ll be
glad to lay her poor head. On her stupid, cross old:
I’egg0tty’s arm again’. And I’ll write to you,’ my dear.
Though Ivain’t no‘ scholar. I And I'll-'-l’ll-”. u Peggotty
fell to kissing the keyhole,,as she eouldn’t‘kiss me. . .-
V “ Thank you,-dear Peggotty I" said I. ‘..‘.Oh, thank
you! Thank you! lVill youpromiso me one thing,‘.
Peggotty? Vvill vou write and tell Mr. Peggotty and
1ittlo'Ern'ly-and Itlrs. Gummidgep and Ham, t at I‘a1n
not so bad as they might suppose, and thatl sent ’em all
my lovesespecilally to little Em’ly? XVIII you, if -you
plcnse,I’eggotty‘?” ‘ ' ‘ " W 3 . ' .v p
The kind soul promised, and we both of us kissed the
keyholewith the great affection-Iipatteditwith my
hand,‘ I recollect, as if it had‘ been her honest face-and
parted. From that night there grew ‘npin my breast,
a‘ feeling for Peggotty‘whieh' I cannot’ very well define.
She did‘ not replace my mother ; no one could do that ;
but she came into a vacancy in my liearhwhlch C1“50‘1
upon her, and I felt towards her something Ihave never
felt for any other human being. It was a‘ sort of com-
ical allection, too; and yet if she had died. .1 cannot
think what I should have done, or how I should have
acted out ‘ the tragedy it would have been to me-
‘ Ingthe morning Miss Murdstone appeared as usual,
1
ahd told me I was going to school ; which‘ was .not;al.to-I
gether such news to me as she supposed; She also in-
formed me that when I was dressed, I Was 10 COIDG d0“"n-
stairs into the parlour, and have my breakfast There.
I found my mother, very pale ’and with red eyes 2 into
whose arms I ran, and begged her pardon from 1113' Sn‘-
fering soul. ‘
“ Oh, Davy l" she said. "That you, 601115 11.11” M1)’
one I love i Try to be better, pray to be better.‘ I for-
ive you; but I am so grieved, Davy, that you should
lave such bad passions in your heart." I -, . . ' . -
“Yes, ‘my own precious Davy,”, she ‘replied; L".I5-oliasi '
....-..w. ,-.-n;.
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I..,-.-;.l..-sew , >.. V “.,WN,M J 5