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ALAPIQEQ
up THE: LED-EER
' FTER reading "The Mall Hatter"
Ledger ladies are going to walk right
up to their husbands and say:
"Have to have a new hat.”
It's that kind of 3 story. it is per-
meated with hats: there are long hats,
and square hats and triangular hats. lat
ones. lean ones. drab ones.‘ colorful ones.
smart hats. quiet hats. union! lists.
gorgeous hats. hats tnmmedwmd huts
untrirnmed. hats for the theater and hats
for in morning in garden-it's a
Carnival at hezll-gear in which the two
e
CHICAGO LEDGER
VOL XLVIH.
(Copyright. 1520. by W. D. Boyce Co.)
- JULY 3. 1 ..
N0. 27.
lered lu second-class mutter June :4, 1855. at the pwtomce at Chicago, Illinois, under
. En
not ox March :, lsn
. Published Every Saturday
W.'D. BOYCE C0., CHICAGO, ILL. ‘
5oo.su North Deurborn Street. 4
FUBSCRHTION )ZATES. . ' '
Single autmrlptlona lo the Chicago Ledger by mail 32.00 a yeer (5: Issues). $1.40 tor six
2 made b nit,
>. three moniha 50 cenu in advance.
Remittances should I) Bank Dr
lteulszereo Letter. Poetotllt-e or'l-zxpresr Money Order. pnyublu to the Chic-lgo Ledger. The
address no on your paper shows the date to which your lubscrlptiou in paid.
Sinnle mplu, 5 cents.
. BACK NUMIIEJS. '
Back numbers 01 the Ledger promptly mailed. Always glve the date: deslred, plalnl
written. nrromymnied by your run address. Price 5 cents per copy.
AIIVERTISXNG ILITES.
1- Display. $3.00 each Agate Line: tor Classilled, :5
cents a ward. Der lnsertlon for
F3
clrt-ulauon or the Chicago Ledger and The Saturday Blade combined
ll rights in stories purchuueu by the Ledger revert to the author lollowlng their pub-
A
llcnlmn by us. All
consent ol the author,
persons are warned ageinli rebrlullng them wlthaul. nrst obtaining the
foremost . ar y
lovable. The hero is a man 0! action and
of many‘ words. also-in fact we were
wondering if the author had 3 dark pur-
' Perhaps he had
smeared pastry over his late?
Pe'rSorl2II‘Inerttion:
l. 1. Sir and the TI'arnv-(hat-wr'ltes-
edltorizls had a little ditlerence over
the meaning of the word "sa5slpa-
neogous.‘ and I. I. Sir is at the office
with a swelled and darkened optical
organ. Perhaps that explains the
shortness at his “pome” his week
[3 details 'Gr"lS" Dull into his ll-
Iostratiorl-: at the humor series are
often as interesting foremost
figures. To wit: the tea-jacket and the
earrings (page 5. title illustration), and
the speckled tlz (In the one-column cut)
in the last picture. don‘K overlook
the humor. or the lady With the ear
trumpet and the brlJe's bouquet with
tho glorious sunflower!
It’: getting :5 bit warm. we admit. to
be running 3 story called Thin Ice-it
won't be long now until-it melts and
the hero has .-l chance to swim ashore
01! have no iota rm; hard it is to
N
lug-“add a letter to A tree and Find
commander.‘ and our dull brain refuses
to won: and the presses are ltel
the make-up waiting rnr our
0. K. and the whole works are Jimrrlerl-
simply because we can't so ve at “double
decapitation.‘ It is the disappointment
' of our lire when we anally arrive a a
troniziugl: that It was only desired that
we “lease our br1lns!"
l
X E HAPPENED [11 be riding in 3 ca-
boose. one lime (why? When’ 0
says. is a diflerent
id one. "told my this
‘Son, believe every-
u:Vl’I‘.'l!
doesn‘t cost you anything. When it does.
lnvestigalef " .
('Yep,‘ said the other. “(hare good.
And here’: what my old man told me
when I started out: The man that win:
tank the one that watches the clock go
round; he isn't the one that tluitll with
llls hammer up when the clock strikes:
he‘: the chap that does what he‘: paid
tor and a little bit more. it seems
of watching the in n
and strikes almost as otten us the clock.
There was A wealthy man entertaining
of industrial workers at his
e speaker (or the
doorstep.
"please
be careful not to say anything against
capital.” . -
"why?" giowered the radical,
"on. because our butler mll:htn‘t like
H!"
AND. to be seriauz-l,.we curt Set a. D"-
ol a poem written by Ernest Dow-
son out of mind this morning:
"They are not long. the wezvinr: and
the laughter,
love and desire and hate.
1 I -r. they have no portion in us alter
.W- pass the gala.’
Another Big Interview Scoop
By The Editor I '
abrupt departure for Paris to take
part ln her new Futurist dramatic
production. the Editor has been be-
‘jeged with inqui ’es from her feminine
admirers-and. hist! even the lnenE--
regarding bmuty methods. There is no
doubt that Madame Flauvelfe was the
specialist par excellence in the making
beautiful at those not so blessed, and
the keeping beautiful of those who
were fortunate enough to start the
game at lite with an even chance,
or even a. lead. ‘We had ho
Madame would continue
grace our columns for many, many
months with her exclusive secrets. but
since she consented in the first place
to do so only on condition that she I:
allowed to terminate her departmen
should her profession call her back to
Paris. we could arilly -voice any com-
plaint when she departed so abruptly. .
The mass of inquiries and questions
concerning beauty lotions. rouges, re-
duction methods and so forth, acculnu.
latin; on our desk has made it neces-
sary for us to secure one last genuine
Flztuvette interview and clean up the
department. . Thus it was that we-the
Editor-on our book. cabled
Madame Flallvetle ‘at the 'I"heatro
Rayale. in Paris, last Wednesday and in
return received in French a wire
whit: ‘ . .
For I-‘lauvette interview refer you
to my long lost brother. Iluzo Flau-
vette, last heard of at the Hotel La
Supernne, 60$ 3. State street. Cili-
cago.‘ Am recuperating from over-
work and unable to contribute.
DAME FLAUVETTE.
Tbua it was that we wended our way
down to the Hotel superfine on South
State ltreel. The Hotel Superilnc was a
rambling brick structure with the paint
peeling oi‘! in great red nabs. the win-
dow: stuffed with newspaper: where
they were cracked. and. under a painted
sign over the doorway which read:
“Lodgings, 10 cents per night. Bring
your own new "a vicious-looking
EVER since Madame Flauvette'a
no
lllr. Flauvetle. he
scratched his thin.
"You mean: Hugo,
. cull.’ WelL
ypu‘re in luck, I‘m a-aay!n'.
Hugo just
beln' as there’: where I come from.
We creaked our way up several nights
of-ntalr: that threatened ta collapse uny
to, and peering in 1 bl: room saw
some several hundred newspapers lying
about in heat rectangles. evidently com-
prising the the guest: "I6 nlghl.
just gone. And on the center. near the
wall la)‘. evidently. Mr. Flauvette. Ilia
red hole was pointed to the ceiling. and
from it arose a we 2. fog-horn.
Several wisp: of buy stuck out Irom his
real. and ten abby toe: pee
shoe: have been cobbled
back in the halcyon days on shoe-
were but $3.50 a pa . I long llnlr
I‘ an ndver-
tisement (or Mr. Gillette‘: product.
We wake him gently and expluined
our mission. As soon as he learned we
were from the famous chlcngo Ledger
he at once consented to. give Ill an in.
the Ledger. We give In detail his upe- ,
ciulized information upon each
"‘-1 in -
of personal beauty and public appear-
ance. -
- o . o
ROUGES.
Says Hugo Flauvette:
ln previous
"I have used
Stores. and nnd that the effect upon the
proboscis is as good as one can desire
secureclby 3 cheaper and ‘
more obtainable produc A I
CORSETS
Upon corsets. too. wt: for years
been suffering a delusion. I had thought
hat a “ ‘- " clathesline-l was so
particular that I would consider nothing
seven-strand clotbeslin
f
back ‘
I rusty wire). here is the covering par
excellence. I have not had
or over 3 month.
and tight ind fine,
ocally-baled hay wire is The Thing. and
NOV!‘ clotbesline.
’ PERFUEIES.
This is determined chleily in the way
3 man travels. some 0! my brethren of
a so.
of my v I travel ONLY
in cars loaded with Jersey cows.
MASSAGE. ‘
inadvisable (or one to
lndulge In too ous passive exer.
C‘59> e picking
out or a newly-painted cottage with all
the evidence of neWly-weddigm "om
which to steal ecliblee results in a drub-
It is highly
Rimes of the Times ’ ‘ .
I BYLLSIE.
I tell you unequiv- '
bing tram a young and strong master-
ol-the-house. I generally pick out a.
house whose architecture and condition
shows that the farmer ls at least over‘
45 years of age.
rom it man of this
drastic, and just as highly ratlmulating
o the circulation and less hard on the
ear: as that coming from a. younger
h
man.
CARE OF THE HAIR.
I unequivocally ecommend a.
tooth comb for best results, some take
overly painstaking methods. and I even
once knew of an organ-grinder knight
of the road who used his monkey for the
purpose. would say a weekly
combill with a. mesh of at least seventy
to the inch will prove elllcaclous.
g ‘THE TEETH.
Cleaning of the teeth regularly is not
only a. duty, but. to the highly aesthetic.
a pleasure I scrub my one tooth every
Sunday morning with coarse pan
f THE EYELASHES.
The C. I. & P. R. R. uses a. peculiar son
coal which gives This
that I travel chiefly upon the
Denver, which makes 3, cinder as black
as Cerberus. -
DIET.
Pie once a month. That. and no more.
Liy inviolable rule. A (at milk-led
chicken at least every other day. broiled
' nre on the
x
r upon the wrong side of the wind, Lhe
owner of the chicken generally ecents it
or sees operations, with the result that
the running necesshry interferes '
the digestion. Potatoes are bad. as they
almost always grow right back of the
owner's house. is excellent it
sown thickly enough so that one in well
concealed. Watermelon should be eaten
soon after pic
SLEEP.
one should pass at least twenty hours
01' the twenty-four each day in-slumber.
Slumber builds up the nervous system.
shattered from searching for food and
avoiding the consequences ot obtaining
that 1' . one should not endeavor to
sleep while in transit. as the shock
when one wakes up to llnrl oneself in the
custody a town constable is highly ;
deleterious to the cerebellum
' A .‘- LEXERCISE. ,
.None if possible. At-least. as little
as feasible. Look at the pyramids of
Egypt‘ - - monuments to the great
demon. exercise that it requires
literally weeks of luallng to recover
from the exercise involved in saving a.
few sticks of wood. No, I forbid exer-
cise to Ledger readers consulting mt-
upon this point. >
. o o 0
At this juncture the
lodging house
. .
order from the
attendant-"All out.’
as the nearest Pitts-
burgh Joe restaurant. where we lelt him
and hastened back to the Ledger omce
-v - <-.-..,....... .-.n.. V7‘.
not-well we have ‘
done our durndest to please.
4' on: ‘
Vulgar Ostentatiou.
"BLIGGINS is trying to dress in a way
that will make people think he is 7 '
making a whole lot or money.”
ilk hat and patent leather shoes and
all that sort or Lhlng?" ’ v
"Not these days.
suit of overall: and is carrying A Plum‘
hers outllt.“
FAME
He yawns and passes down the street.
by
The candidate goes down the street
And see! himself on every hand.
His face looks out from poster; from
The windows, Iran the paper'5rand
The candidate‘: indifferent,
Ha mnnnerhu calm and chill‘
He sees his name on every gm’;-,
‘ 3"‘ has no-Surging thrlll.
And all h friends
He hoped that all his folks would know.
be told.
For Benny’; V", g v
The candidate is 173?‘ and‘ oh’
A billboard where
And yesterday our galley boy
And all unmoved goee
his name appears
In letters ten feet lllgh--
With awed delight was smitten.’
Because be round his name within .
e copy we had written.’
‘He has put on 3 '3‘