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WISE BOY
chance tor I: Din-k none.
Sister-I think it you would propose
to Mabel she would accept you. ,
, Jack (eagerly)-Do you‘! Has she said . ‘
HE little boy who had received his
' first jilting was eating far too many
.' ' ‘anything? . sweets. “Why can‘t you " contented
v . , Sister-No. but I know she is deeply With 8 fell‘. like Other b05'55‘ asked “I3
I in love with Harry Maxwell and h n- mother.
"Mummy," he answered. “daddy told
me that a man who smokes too mue
' gets smokers heart, and man who
rows too much gets rowers’ heart and-
well-I‘m eating sweets too much."
gagement has Just been announced.
VVHY, INDEED?
19
A , ' . A Family Alrnlr.
ii iimul V in
you ought
, indignant bystander.
' “Don't you worry about this little set-
to." said the man who was holdine: the
beiligerents' hats and coats. "Both
them are kin to me and no matter which
one wins I can't lose.''
7
Their Tnkln g V"ayl-I.
There was a. swap social in Oak Park
‘ i the other evening. The lo 1 paper.
comm ting n ‘ "Everybody
o it, sai
took something they
of the ladies took their husbands."
r 2
SIMPLE.
I cannot sing the old songs
Because they are so rotten.
QUALIFYING IT
“ OVV. brudclren and sistalis," solemnly
said good old Parson in the course uf
a recent experience meeting, “I axes yo‘
pralrs for our Erudder Simmons. what
has (less 'knowietlged (lat he's been a
mlzzable sinner, and:-"
' " on a. minute. palisorii lloie on,
lf yo‘ please, Salli" interrupted Goat
Simmons, the gambling man, “I didn't
specify riutii'n‘ Jboiit bcin‘ mizzable.
mah sins uh-kaze dey don't
pay: dat's all!"
. Bin. LoRWXGo-
v.
Only Finger Tips.
Mrs. Palmer (looking up from her book)-In some parts of Africa a man
d-)esn’t know his wife until after he has marrie er.
Mr, Palmer (without looking‘ up from his newspaper)-Why mention Africa
especially? ‘ . -
Anybody Out?
A British railway guard found
The Reason.
Erlitor (to joke that has appeared on
his desk)-You seem a bit familiar, but self employed on a
3 can't Just place you " his
Joke-Nothing surprising‘ about that; ivillcaerogochyiipwal.
nobody can since my visit to England. van and stared at the station board.
‘ ' Then he made a sweeping gesture with
his arm and cried. "If there's anybody
him-
. ‘nix’? I
The good old lien is on the Job ‘" “'9' ‘M3 ‘S “1
Poker Tnxnllon.
Is what makes men lay bricks? "What you regard as the most
h
I SOLID ll VOR I
I DON'T THINK I'LL NAM
(la
satisfactory form of taxation?"
"T e kitty in a poker game," replied
Senator Sorghum. "lt‘s liberal and per-
fecily reliable, and at the same time
everybody is too much engaged in tryiriigr
se."
to win to notice the expen
V
5
“Do you ever see any tips in tlil
The Mill: ‘Vino Does.
. .. - . . . hotel ',’" -
E“t?E'B0%VEALTE3i%“ 2:.3%:i>i:";?.%’..?v:'LT?ti5%i?Ei::iiEf .:e“?sr 3:‘f:'.:=::s.--8"’
ten. But when l sees one 5 ’
hovelin‘ snow.
. llubhles ‘VIII Cull Illm Illeusrd.
Shopper-I want to buy a necktie for
my husband, - ,
CierkeS'orry, madam, but we, are not
rermitterl to sell nccktles to women who
are iinaccompanied hy men.
I
O I takes my‘hat of: to him
,1 .
E Thuvihrr Foolish Que-non,
“Can you swim, little bo
"Yes, sir.’ ‘ s
"where did you earn'."
"in the water, sir." - i
"nun was n Prnrh. '
“What was the biggest mistake you
with ever mn-ie?"
"Thinking l was too foxy to make ii.
never big mistake." . .
, n
Exclusive.
C9lEbYIly1AYB you
Shakespeare.
Mrs, Gotrox (liaurchtilwml am
familiar with anybody. '
. U
familiar
7.
A Black Outlook. '
lie-Be mine, tinrlimz. You are the
lamp that alone
She-Yes. dear, but papa doesn't think
you are .1 good match for me. '
’‘ I'’ll[lll'l,I’‘‘0I>l.
"l"apa'sayi1 he's going to put his foot
down and stop your visits.”
"Are you lure he said down?" 7
i ' t
to try to Stop them," said the '
can light my existence. .
. rcnnredneus.
“The chairman hasn't shown ul) 3’?!
and we can’t transact any business with-
out him. -‘VIIEL are we going to do’
“I don't know mucli about D2ll‘lILllIlt‘I'I-
tary rules, gcntiemen,",sai4l the new
member of the committee, "but there am
tour of,us here and have zi deck of
cards in my Dockel-"
- v
Hardly.
Irishman harl squeezed himself
into a seat in the car between two fat
women, and presently began wriggling
about.-
"I'm at
able!“ comrrie
““"ell." resnonded the man.
much room to grumble!"
3?. ‘ A
Pronilse.
ie a
raid you are not very comfort-
nted one of the ladies.
“I haven't
III!
"Papa, Will you 17 n tlruni?"
asked a. little lad of his father.
"But, my boy," answered papa. ‘Tm
afraid you will disturb me very much
with It," '
no, I won't, papa." promised the
little fellow “I'll onlyxplay it when
you're asleep I
.1:
Not in Those Days.
Mrs. Nexdore-Your boy threw BVIUIHD
of coal at our cat. v
Mr. Naybor-I'll attend to the yoiivii:
rascal. hat that We care anytllingalluut
your cat, but no boy of mine is going
to waste coal in that manner. ‘ ,‘
xvron; l':iriy.
. The telephone rang. and the physician
l"eDllEd in his usual .gt-nile‘ voice. Tiien
H Hand me my ban!" he cried.
A man has Just telephoned in a dyl'
voice that he cannot live without me.
"ll alt," said his wife. who had piciterl
up the receiver, “that will is for Edith."
-I-5
' .l Llgmwei;-iri Citizen.
"Just to look at Mr. Pnmpleigh, you'll
tl"lllYi‘llf the world couldn't wag W'Hh(‘u[
"Maybe 50," said Mr. Grumpson. "but -
after hearing him talk for five minutes
youd realize that he wouldn't be indis-
1>ensa'l">le to a town of only 5'00 inhabi-
V.
‘Vorntn Ill ‘Yunnan.
"Not many women care much for out-
door sports, do they?"
Oh I don't know. Did you ever see
0 dill not like to hunt bargains.
for compliments. be in the swim,
Play 3. love game. make 9. hit with her
clothe "
' one vrh
"‘Snough! I was wrong!” ‘
‘ Smnllu: my
hav heard men said Senator
Sorghum, "discourslni; most eloquently
on the American eagle. when what their
minds were really on was qua“ on tongu-
.- llrr .I;ulrty‘.
Doctor-I'm afraid I'll have to operate
‘ for avbeniliritis
‘ Beauty-(lli, doctor. will the scar show?
hot unless you HO into the Yl“l0VII‘R."
Readers ‘accustomed to solving
the Ledger puzzles will find them
on Page 28, under the heading
“Sometliii-lg to Make Thinkers
hink." " - "