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_ duches:
“of course.
‘elie!
" wife saw the jok
’son in-the vi
. can I do for you,
(This story commen
need in No, 643.)
SUCH QUIET CHAPS
Ry
The Boys of Whackem _ Academy
by TOM
Author of eGharley Chinn,” “Billy Buti
“Jim Jump,” “Mat, the Mimic,
PART VY.
Into the parlor went Belt, expecting to
receive his distinguished gues ests,
he messenger had told him that they
looked rich, and he had his notions up
pretty high.
There must be an auto with a liveried
footman hanging on behind, ‘Standing at
the door.
ie
iM x
BELT wis EFFUSIVELY GREETED BY AN OVERDRESSED COLORED LADY AND. A YOUNG DARKY.
BELT WAS STAGGERED, THE BOYS AT THE
SNITZ SEEMED PLEASED,
SAH?” “PLEASED TO SEE YO’.
WINDOW SNICKERED,
The Jady could be little short of a
AS for the son, he was in the swell set,
Belt was effusively greeted by an over-
dressed colored lady and a young darky.
“How yo’ is, Puffessah?”
“Pleased to see yo’, “Dis is mah son.”
Belt was staggered.
The boys at the window snickered.
_ Whackem looked horrified,
Snitz seemed pleased.
He had never liked Belt.
So these were the dude professor’s rich
iAftor that Belt need put on no
Whackem was greatly astonished, ‘bat his
The boys had "sot the coon lady and her
They had oR ‘her that Belt would be
proud to teach the boy for the cost of his
washing.
The wench had money, and now she
wanted her boy educated.
The offer was not to be rejected.
‘0 do honor to the occasion, she had
togged herself out to kil
The boy was ‘reseed “likewise, and it
pretty nearly killed him.
He had never felt more uncomfortable
in his life.
“Aoh, I beg pahdon,” said Belt, . “What
am Mr. Belt.”
“An’ dish yer is 2 mah | son wha’ yo’ is ter
gib an eddicashin to. He’s a smaht boy,
Ah tol’ yo’, an’ ef he don’ do as yo’ tol’
him jus yo swat him.”
“But, my deah madam, Doctah Whackem
is the principal. You should see him, don’t
you
Belt had not meant to be funny.
It was only his way of getting out of an
unpleasant job.
Whackem thought that a job was being
put up on
He got out, “Ot that in a hurry, .
WHACKEM LOOKED HORRIFIED.
TEASER
Rubber,” “ody e, Podge, and Dodge,”
“phe Schoolboy Minstrel” ete,
His wife laughed.
So. did Snitz.
Likewise the boys.
“Yas, I know dat,” said the wench, “but
wha’ Ah wan’s is a pribit tooter fo’ mah
son, an’ he done heard dat yo’ toots love-
“Aoh!” said Belt. “But I have no time
to sive to any more private pupils, don’t] Rush,
you know.”
“Ah sen’ him up any time yo’ lak, seben! man, sure nuffee.”
DIS IS MAH SON.”
o’clock in de mo’nin or twelb at night, any
ol time’ll suit me, Puffess:
“No, I really cahn’t, Son now,” said
Belt, who began to be dimly conscious that
somebody 1 had been roasting him.
“Den wha’ fo’ yo’ sen’ fo’ me, nm?” ask-
ed the ‘a of color.
“Me? I nevah did, I asshaw you, ma’ am.
You must be mistaken. Ach, | Exense me,
I have a pupil waiting for me
Then Belt fled, while Schnitzer chuckled
and said:
j “Ach, dose was der peoples what dat
dood gets 2 Pig head over, iss it?) Ach, it
is to
the. tee ‘lady tumbled.
“Don' yo’ laugh at me, sah,” she snorted.
“Ah've got money ‘nuff to buy yo’ o’t free,
fo’ times, an’ ef Ah wan’s a tooter fo’ mah
boy, dat ain’ no business oO’ yo'n.”
“Oxcuse me, ma’am,” said the Dutch-
man. “I don’t was laugh at you, I was
laugh. at dot dood. He. didn’t knowed
enough to taught dot boy von yours, und
dot’s why he make oxcuse, und dot’s how
T lau
“H" a dat’s diffe’nt,”
“Maybe yo’ learn him yo’ own
Snitz pleaded an engagement and got
ou
said the
£9
lady.
Then the lady got out herself and the
show was ove!
Belt would have very much
know who got up that job on him.
Only the participants in it knew,
ever, and they were not .asked.
The dude, professor was just as airy after
that- as before, for there are some folks
who never take a drop to themselves.
That gave the boys another chance to
roast him, but ey had to give some other
fellow a chance
Sing Hi was the lucky one.
On Mondays he washed.
That is.to say, he did the washing for
the family,
He nung the clothes on a fine lawn “pack
of the house.
liked to
how-
HAPPY DAYS...
Thither went Tom, Dick and Harry when
a part of the wash had been hung out.
Sing was in the laundry getting more
stuff to put on the line.
t was recess time, and the boys had a
few minutes to themselves,
They improved them.
ng went to ‘the lawn again he
suddenly dropped his basket in a terrible
fright and rushed for the schoo!
Into the big room he came tunbling pell-
mell and cried:
“Oh, Flesser, Dockee, evlyblody, de Ilish-
n an’ de niggee man go hang deirself
flont side o’ glass outee back. Come klick,
come cuttee dlown.”
“Why didn’t you cut them down your-
self,” demanded Whackem, ‘“if you saw
them hanging there?
“Me no likee. Velly bad luckee cuttee
man dlown. Me hab takee care of he all
time afterlards.”
“Go cut them down this instant,” said
“The idea of waiting so long!”
“Yeppee, dat all light. So long for Iish-
“Dear me,
We are wast-
time,” mutter-
ed the Doctor.
“ Something
must be done
at. once,”
Then he
hurried out,
followed by
Rush, Belt and
half the boys.
Dick and his
chums had not
supposed that
Sing would go
to Whackem
when he saw
those two
dummy figures
of Barney and
Mose hanging
on the line.
They ex-
pected that he
would have a
fit
use some very
p icturesque
language,
They had
never sup-
posed that he
would come to
the Doctor
with his tale
of woe, how-
ever.
They = skip-
ped out, there-
fore, ahead of
Whackem.
Just outside
the house the
sallying party
“HOW YO’ IS, PUF-
jh, so you
ented of
your rash deed, did you?” “asked Rush.
nee Sing saw Barney he began to
shak
“Go alay, ghostee, me no likee,” he chat-
tered.
-“Phwat’s thot, sor?” asked Barney.
“Phwat ails thot Chinayser? sy yez got
a fit, or phwat ails yez at al
“Got tired of hanging, a” heked Rush.
“Tired av hangin’, is ut? Faix, I niver
thried it.”
“Cut yourself down, perhaps?”
“Aoh, or maybe Sing Hi lied, don’t you |
know,” suggested Belt. “That’s possible.”
“Cut mesilf deown, is ut?” repeated Bar-
ney “Sure, I don’t know phwat yez mean
at al
Go alay,.ghostee, me no likee, cliss-
closs, shoo-fly, go alay.”
“Phwat are yez shakin’ yer fishts an’
mutterin’ yer gincantations at me fur, ye
yaller lobsther?” cried the little Irishman,
in a rage. . “Sure, it’s a -straightiacket yez
want fur.um, Docther .”
“T gro is hanging there all this
time,” said Rush. “We must not forget
im.”
Then off ran half the party to rescue
Mose.
and met him coming out of the garden.
thought you went and hanged. your-
self, ” said Rush
Mose Taughed.
“Huh! wha’ fo’ Ah do dat? Ain’ no fun
in dat ’ere, Wha’ Ah be sech a fool as
dat. fo’, h’m?”
“Sing Hi said he saw you hanging on the
clothesline.”
“Dat Chinee big liah, dat’s wha’ he am.
Neber done nuffin’ o’ ‘de so’t. Wha’ fo’
Ah wan’ ter do dat *ere, when Ah kin hab
lots o’ fun yet?”
“Aoh, I’m shaw the fellow lied,” remark-
ed Belt.
Meanwhile something like the samme con-
versation was held with Bar:
Whackem finally came own to dommon
language, and-asked Barney if he had
hanged himself and why:
Barney said he hadn
Sing said he had, and offered to show
Whackem the corpses of Barney and Mose
hanging on the line.
Then all hands. ‘went to the clothes-
drying grounds,
And there were no dummies to be found,
of course,
Those quiet chaps had seen to that.
“I had an ideah-the fellah lied,” said
Belt. “You Couldn't trust these Chinese,
don’t you kn
“How be?” Tmuttered Sing, when he saw
no sled sign ot the corpses. “Him gonee in
Y, SO
“Paix, ‘thin, that’s where ye’ll never
get,” sald Barney, +“ av -yez do be tellin’
so manny lies.”
“Wha’ de mattah wif yo’, Chinaman?”
asked Mose, “Wha’ fo’ yo’ wan’ ter lie
fo’ lak dat? Maybe dey ain’ no Chinee
ped, Place, an’ so yo’ ain’ ’fraid ter tol’
one no tellee lie; me see Ilishman an’
niggee hangee by line,”. protested Sing.
He was put down asa Mar by most of
that crowd,
few thought that some of the boys
had fooled him by hanging dummies. -on
the line.
Belt did not credit this, but said that
Sing had lied from the pure love of i
The assembly dispersed, at any rate, ina
no one was any wis
“Close call, that,” ‘remarked Mr. Richard
Putnam, later,
no one suspects. us,”
Thomas Waterman,
“We're such quiet chaps, you “know,”
put in Mr, Harry Phillip:
added Mr,
Then Tom, Dick and Harry chuckled a *:
bit and went back to the big schoolroom
and tackled their studies, like the quiet ty
chaps they were. —
Sing got ie from all sides, and was © very.
myn puzzle
ea tian,” said Barney. &a
“Yo "1 neber go ter heaben,” put in Mose.’
“Ach, you was no good, to made all dot
troubles,” sputtered Johanna.
“Me no tellee lie; me no make tlubble,”
protested Sing. “Me see, suree nuffee.
en me go tell bossee.”
“Ah, gwan!” Sputtered Barney.
“Yo's a liah,” declared Mos:
“Chinese man no good for nodings,”
served Johanna.
Sing did not uy to prove anything, for
he simply couldn
Hl the same he was very much puzzled,
and burned no end of joss-sticks to keep
away the evil spirits, which he was certain
“ob-
ting suspected, they were such quiet chaps.
ne afternoon not long after this those
quiet chaps came along and saw Mose
watering the lawn with a bi, hose, the
same being connected with a stopcock at
one side of the hi
Things seemed to be going all right, and
the lawn was getting a fine sprinkling.
Then Dick said- something to Warry
which made that young fenteman smile
and caused Tom to rem:
“That’s all right. He hasn't seen us, and
he won’t Suspect anything.
“Then, e gets to “making, an in-
vestigation, we'll turn it on again?”
Then. “the boys skipped around. to the
side of the house where the connection.
wn a few moments the water supply sud-
denly gave out.
“Now jus’ look o’ dat!” grunted Mose.
“Wasn’ dat jus’ pesterin’? Wha’ yo’ ’spects
made dat watah done give o’t?”
At that moment, as luck would have it,
along came Barney.
The boys, peeking Ground the corner of
the house, just chu
“This is better thas we “thought.”
vt only that Chink would come up
no}
That would be a plenic all right.”
“Hallo,. dere, I’ish, yo’ gone done
wif dat watah?” asked. Mose
“Sure, I’ve done nothin’ at all wid it.
Phwat’s the matther
le titave yez got it. turned on at the noz-
zle
«shu Ah
“Thin nobus ‘ts shtopped.”
“Huh, any fool c’n see dat. Co’ se. it’s
stopped,”
“There’s an impidimint in the pipe, mays
be,” said Barney, i Blow in
Sure
“Will dat cleah it o’t?”
“Sure it might.”
Mose brought the nozzle up to his lips,
put it in his mouth and.blew till his cheeks
Seemed ready to crack.’
Barney was standing behind him, watch-
ing the process with great interest.
“It's comin’!” he yelled.
it!
He did more.
He felt ii “
And just then, to add to the joys of the
boys, that Chinaman came waddling along.
tan” watah don’ run, dat’s wha’ 's de mat- :
“Sure, I hear
Hea ye