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—YTHAPPY DAYS
3
Areton Of Bot, nd His Uncle Dick,” “ Uncle
(This story commenced in No, 233.)
HARRY HAWSER:
MAKING IT PLEASANT FOR OTHERS. hoi
By SAM SMILEY,
Jake,” “Smart & Sharp,”
ai
oliah,” “The Last Bounce,” “The Shortys on the Tramp,” etc.
CHAPTER IV.
Harry tickled Soot’s nose with a
feather,
The result was most disastrous,
Soot sneezed,
‘That shook him
up.
All hands laughed.
* Faix, that’s wan an the naygur.”
**Sootee velly funny fellee.”
“Mein gollies, dot was pooty good
once,”
“Shut up!” bawled the captain.
Then there was silence,
" pLUNK! SLAM
PRIDE GOES BEFORE A FALL,
Bee
eee
SOAS
ai
ad PISS
c%
! BIFF!
>
SPLASH! SOOT STRUCK THE DECK.
WALLY GOT ONE,
LE OPER RS
MR
FE
SO DID THE TRUNKS,
“Aw, aw, but. me twunks, don’t you’
know, aw, aw—I shall have to wecovah
them fawst, aw, aw.”
‘SI up on that ‘aw, aw!'” yelled
Buntline, making a dash for Wally.
The dude skipped, out just in time to
avoid a swat on the jaw.
The trunks were fished up and put inthe
old.
Wally did not get them, or not then, at
all events,
Moreover, when he came on deck dressed
in a blue suit, with a blue shirt to match,
his other trunks were swiped.
e went to dress for dinner he
could not find his swallow-tail, nor his
pumps, nor his swell shirt, nor anything
of that sort, .
Iie did not take much interest in things
generally after that, anyhow.
_The Sally sailed away on the evening
AWAY WENT TRUCK, TRUNKS, DUDE AND THE WHOLE BUSINESS,
MOST OF THEM PLUNKED INTO THE
WATER. WALLY ROLLED OVER AND OVER, HE LOST HIS CAP AND HIS EYEGLASS,
°
The truck pushed him,
He quickened hi
It got so fast
1S
pace,
that he couldn't stop,
nd it,
‘The trunks couldn’t sta
They began to topple,
So did Wally.
Away went his
flew his aw:
His single eyeglass d
ts cord,
His cigarette jumped into the water.
Plunk!
Slam!
umbrella,
ul ca;
iff
Splash!
Soot struck the deck.
He raced clear across it,
Away went truck, tru
whole business,
Pride Boes before a fall.
Wally got one
i e trunks,
gear junked into the water.
Most of them p)
One did a double shuffle on de
It danced about as if an
ie. |
tally rolled over and over after it.
He lost his cap
His umbrella went sailing o
Ye
dome mermaid
ever 8a)
and his eyeglas
has it now,
wit again.
Finally he stopped rollin
Up he got, fee
Out came the ¢
He was
He sras modicing all that noise?’
sked.
Then Soot got
* Who frowed
Ze
ing very much dazed,
aptain,
dem trunks at me?”
anced at the end of
nks, dude and the
cK.
imp had been
Se
ut over the
he
“ Are you cutting mp all these capers?”
the skipper asked Wally,
“Aw, aw, I weally don’t compwehend
the nachah of yaw intewagation, sah,
weally I don’t, aw, aw.”
‘Belay that ‘aw, aw,’ you big fool, or
I'll take a rope’s end to your stern, - Were
you making all that noise ¢"
“Aw, aw, weally, me deah sah, you
wouldn't call me a twunk, I suppose?
Aw, aw, no, to be shaw,-aw, aw. It ‘was
the twunks, sab, aw, aw.”
“You can’t make me believe that one
trunks made all that noise, you blame
‘ool.
“s aw, no, to be shaw, theah waw
faw, aw, aw, but I don’t see but one me-
self, aw, aw, Wondah wheah the othahs
went, don’t you know, aw, aw?”
“Four trunks, you donkey? What, in
the name of Neptune, do you want of four
trunks, you addle head?”
Aw, aw, weally, don’t you know, that
isa most singulah question, aw, aw, yas,
to be shaw, I want faw twunks faw me
wawdwobe, me deah sah—faw me clothes,
don't you know, aw, aw.
our clothes!” howled Captain
Buntline, ‘ Are they all like those you’ve
got on? What are you, anyhow—a soldier,
a sailor, a bisickel rider, or a croquet play-
er
* Aw, aw, I'm a sailah, me deah
yas, a mavwinah, I believe, aw, aw.
“Well, if you're a sailor youcan get off
them togs just as quick as you can,
fe seat of your breeches till you'll
think you've sot on a red-hot stove, Go
fellah—
below, you fool, and put on some respecta.
ble clothes,”
She met some weather on the outside
that night.
It was not what an old salt would call so
rough, .
It was rough enough for Wally all the
8i ‘e
Harry fetched him out on deck to en-
With characteristic perversity, he failed
to enjoy iteven a little bit.
He simply lay down on deck and wept.
“Brace up, Wally old sport, you'll soon
get used toit,” said Harry, “You'll never
bea sailor until you’ve been sick once or
wice.”
“ Aw, aw, 1 weally don’t want to be a
sailah. I want to go—New York |"
“Want to go back to New York, eh ?”
“ Aw, aw, yas, I want—New York !”
Well, you said that twice.
self together, old man, You've got no
sand in you if you're going to give up like
at.
“Oh, deah, I weally think I’m going to
die, aw, aw.”
“Oh, no, you ain't.”
“Oh, dear, I wish I was,”
Then he staggered to the rail.
And stayed there.
The salt spray drencbed him, and the
wind tossed his bangs hither and thither,
ut he didn't care a cent’s worth,
He got soaked, but still he stuck to the
ail.
_In short, poor Wally was dreadfully sea-
or I'll | sick.
Harry hustled him below at midnight,
and tumbled him into his bunk,
He stayed there the rest of the night and
all the next day, .
Finally, he came on deck to find the land
Jeft far behind and the storm over,
he vessel was as clear and spruce as a
new pin, the smell of oil and tar had left
the forecastle, the sails were white, the
decks clean, the brass work shone like a
new dollar, and all hands seemed in the
best of spirits,
Wally wore his blue rig and looked
much more like a sailor than a dude, feel-
ing all right except that he was ravenously
apery.
“Hallo, Wally,” said Harry, who was
loafing about the deck, “how do you
e
“ Awfully hungry, don't you know,” said
the dude, forgetting his drawl.
“Well, you'll soon get overthat. You
fellows will get your breakfast in a few
minutes,
The breakfast consisted of hash, bread
and some very black coffee,
Wally took it allin and wanted more,
Then, as it was his watch on deck, he
ut to work,
“Here, you lubber, go up to the mast-
head and look for whales,” said the skip-
per.
‘* Aw, aw, wheah did you saby ?” asked
Wally.
“To the masthead, you idiot. Can't you
see it? Look up there, you monkey, and
don’t give me so much back talk.”
“Aw, aw, yas,to the top of that stick,
aw.”
e now, shin up
there and look for whales, or l’ll make you
jump with a rope’s end.”
“Aw, aw, to be shaw, yas, but I don’t
see any laddah, aw, aw. Howin cweation
am I going to climb up theah without any
laddah, me deah sah, aw, aw ?”
“Till * aw’ you if you don't stop
that!” roared Captain Buntline, giving
Wally a shove that nearly sent him on his
{Go up and look for whales, you
Harry showed him the shrouds, which
are nothing more than a rope ladder and
told him how to go up, and up went
Wally, feeling very skittish as Te got
towards the top,
However, he reached the lookout all
right, and stood there hanging on to the
ropes fore and aft.
?resently he looked down and shouted:
“ Aw, aw, captain, theah aw no whales
up heah, aw, aw. Aw, aw, I have looked
all ovah and I cabn’t ‘find any heah,,aw,
aw,”
““What's that, you fool?” yelled the
skipper,
“ Aw, aw, theah aw no whales up beah,
aw, aw, weally theah aw none, aw, aw.”
e second mate and the sailors on deck,
the cook, the steward, and the carpenter
gan to swap grins,
“* Where did you look, plague take you?”
“Aw, aw,up heah at the mabsthead,
don’t yeu know, aw, 8 a whale very
big. Pawhaps he’s hiding in the cwacks.”
Soot let out a regular gufflaw,
“Wow! Golly, ef dat dood didn’ 'spect
to fin’ whales on de looke’t! Wondah ho’
he tinks day got up dar?"
“Not in the crosstrees, you lubber |!”
howled the captain. ‘Look out on the
ocean, you fool, and when you see a whale
spout, sing out, and stay up there till you
0,
“ Aw, aw, yas, to be shauh, Now I com-
pwehend, yas, aw, aw.”
“Shut up that ‘aw, aw,’ or
there and chuck you overboard,’
Wally said no more, but everybody ex-
cept the skipper chuckled.
“What sort of blame- fool is he, any-
how?” muttered Buntline,
find whales at the crosstrees, does he?
Well, he is an idiot, and no mistake,”
“You told him to goto the masthead and
look for whales chuckle
FM go up
as
his part of the ocean, at any rate,” laughed
arry. .
There was really no need in sending
Wally up, unless it was to get rid of him on
deck.
There probably wasn'ta whale within
. | five hundred miles.
The skipper knew it as well as the next
8
an,
All he wanted was to get Wally out of
the way, and teach him to climb the rig-
ing.
Wally stood up there for half an hour
and then got tired.
He had scanned the horizon in all direc-
tions without seeing the first sign of a
whale,
Ile had his cigarette case with him.
He was likewise provided with matches,
@ two were soon combined, .
Wally did not know that it was against
all rules to smoke at the masthead or at
the wheel,
Ile wanted to smoke, and did.
Pretty soon, however, the skipper got
onto him,
He saw the smoke wreathes curling
“Expects to -