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NEW YORK, SATERDAY, MAY 7, 1892,
THE NEW YORK FIRESIDE COMPANION.
One copy for one year
Four copies for
Persona geting up Clubs ean add single copes at $2.50 each,
$3.00
THE NEW YORK FIRESIDE COMPANION and THE NEW
YORK AND Paf a vou x. LADIES’ FASHION BAZAR
ordered togothe $
All communications, business or otherwise, must be
drested 10 . GEORGE MUNRO,
Publisher Fireside Companion.
NOT MORE—NOT LESS.
BY
‘CaLit was the night in that still auturaa weather,
‘And calmer stil and colder were the twain
whe. ho, Parting, then, might yet have kept together,
‘pride not stronger been than even pain,
VA ROSE-INNES.
‘There wore no bitter teary, no then of
oaches utter'd at hie end;
aul sould They iieek yeary hones, of on the morrow,
‘courteous ease as friend meets friend.
sorrow,
Oby mocking words for thogo tho once loved madly,
jenveforth to be mere friends—not less—not more—
peep in ench heart a death-knell sounded sadly
For love, deemed deathless, {a glad days of Fore,
‘Not more than friends—~the voices must not falter,
‘Lest brokea tones Yain regret:
And on the lips, she the fenced sulle taunt not alter
‘o show how, "neath that mask, grief's lines are set,
[Let them take heed, leet any word be spoken
fo rouse some gost from out the buried past
‘Though the dear tes that bo ‘once are broken,
‘A strange spell lingers yet, and holds thein fast.
Not leas than friends—but, a! the friendship offered
= oats of suk ttle worth now fore ie don
- “Tis hard co take the band thus coldly profes ered
1d feel the tender, thrilling touch bas
Gone with the day, when just one word was needed
Those heavy clouds of pride and doubt to lite:
But all jn vaio, love's driog voice had pleaded;
w far apart, each lonely life must drift,
And she will never know, at their next meeting,
How hard be fought an outward calm to gain;
Nor will be see, beneath the friendly. grevting,
How her true heart still yearns to his through pain.
according £0 Act of Congress, to the sear 192, b
Baten gonae aro, ae ones oe Ong tearing
ROHIE THE WONDER:
The Extrardigary 1 Boy Detective.
AThrilling Narrative of Adventures
Br “OLD SLEUTH,”
Aujhor of" Old Tronsides, the Giant Detective,”
Bout
re siory wag somueneyd fp Ri ©
Toi shay wan sommmenegd te NWI OLD
[rAis STORY WILL NOT BR PUBLISHED IN BOOK FoRM.]
- CHAPTER IX.
‘Mapisox Foner vee from his bed, opened the
door, and there st
“You are here, eh?”
Yes, 1 ara ees ‘and Iam lucky to get here.”
out are”
t-Well f've been played bad, you bet.”
“What happened’ ‘you! ue
Left you on the boat coming from Hunter's
“1 was “laying? for your torment.”
“Yen
“found bim.”
# Yoa did?”
cabo told his story. Foloy listened, with @ mad
%
ae
38
5
a
&
are here!
«flow 3 1 You treme round 1 scot for Alec. Hie
explaived matters wrben I wae rout before the
Aeyiaon't appear against anal Hench he worried | bi
appear
sett aren at tell you, Saddle, Wt was a
mo.
Re Ene ee paid Foley between bis set. teeth;
ssahoy azo having iC all their own way; bot Fit get
in my work b: ‘then We Will see how
and who’ seh
° * Me there Jnore than one running you down,
“Maddie
eT can't tell yet; but I'l know.
tea ped himself, and the two men went out
together to get their breakfast, On the way, Beebe
vin
to
“Font
“ ard tists Beeb
zeus ve ped t id one advantage.
T've seen the ‘aeril toi
“ Bat it did you ine Bo
sehr ta at *
‘Foley
as afte! ee when hep bad eaten thelr
piney eats
man; I will want to see
oat fro roma
breakra, aa yon later in
the ae ne
t means ‘ git.”
That meas fice on hand.”
ale, os ”
cee ea eine for om; bt
I must attend to some other business at present.
“Gooding, Maddie, dear.”
“Ge doy, 1
: rated, and Foley started on
The two q
Te stood awhile at Broadway
toward, Broadw way. Ti eae att
ing
nothing to
Doysall read ‘ge start
these United States: but this
7 thie ha \Jowned the only
Se heat Well,
of the Fest Soe dean Will ‘get on to bs,
Foley rode down Broadway. He rode to the
Fawilton Ferry. He crossed
He pi Siong to a neighborhood where many
irsilana ares indeed, it 13 known as New Italy.
far when ho entered a place kept by
3 yw Foley, and
“Hes Boer been around
Mal answered in broken
«TP don’t know hie.” opi
& You don't know him?”
No.”
s What are you giving me?”
There shot malloant light into the Teatian’s
gyess, when Foley, seeing
coming dangerous, * sslgn
fuere came change over the Tralian at once.
He came oat from behind the bar, offered bis hand,
and said, fn a low tone:
# end i 48 upstairs.”
‘Aster
“Whoa wil he come down?”
“1 will call him.”
“ >
el was_@ dilapidated old place. There
ete two itis old frame buildings standing side by
side, occupied,
There we The wails
abutt f waa a partition wail
ig Wails were
thin that one standing in Sir Pine could easily
overhear anything that was, epoken in an ordinal
je from foom to room, once bee
whole ow of the houses, but four of them had been
burned down, and new houses had never been
erected os vo the ‘old sites.
‘8 seat ata table. A fow moments
yasce anda very bandsome, darli-faced man en-
red the room. ife had small featnres, aswarthy
complesion, and glittering pack €
loo, Fort?” sald Foley.
«You here,
iyeut ‘Fant to have a talk with you.”
what you want, and I’ve good news,
thing almost roady.”
Pye bad news.”
38
“Bh is Lint go
“Yes.”
‘Mell mix the news.”
ari
“Pole told Pee. . -
&
in several railway express-cat ro
“Well, he may have | % ‘ther purpose. But he
means business, ¥o ow T'll tell me
something: You Toow” ” 1 opposed dropp'
Toyee out,”
sr You feared that kid ;
“la koew we ould have to ‘drop’ him
oat fests}
<i And that’s your gatnet”
“ «And you undertake the job?”
{You mean to kill bim?”?
“Tao.
Tha He?
fan
‘No uso to ‘mouth things’ now: we, rust get
him oat of the
We can’t go out
“ “Howat this year.
out of busi
fof business.”
"i The bese re al ‘deed broke.’
“ the * fancy tara.”
atk ha better look out,
“Yor You may be ¢ nipped, ”
and then:
“T must keep the fire bi
« Tvo a few hundreds,”
The Italian meditated s moment, and sald:
trust me ‘a thindrea?”*
« Corta
“ “be atta have arun of tuck.”
zing.”
“« “wi ui you Palme into gamer” -
8."
“Aen os
gut?"
“Pit meet you.”
“Good enough.”*
“Ana, io the meantime, show yourself up.”
“What fort”?
‘The Italian emiled, and gatds :
ilve already started in2*
ott ds spot rid of of the Kd and ren soon ll
up; but with hit loose and 01 3 0
business to go.
‘We will here haf Archie had gone West,
fo'did uot return und a few weeks previous to
le disappearance of Billy Joyce, We will state
fur" that the lad overheard every word that
between Foley and the nan & ‘fortunis The lad
“< There is some one on our track.” aid been on the lay when Becks aad Foley Went to
12? te breakfast, die | followed i man to ‘Broa aa
came a glitter in the wonderfal eyes of Ho saw him start for Brooklyn, He discern
Fortunl, and, after an ejaculatton, he repeated, in its destination, wand stole aiead-of hima, He soe
me @avantaye, aud WAS On deck when
ere ig some one on onr track?” Fol entered ‘the adjoining place. He “ lay low
ety word, aad there was & smile of
inlisfaction on Els" fave as Bo’ d, in an
« rapge. under-tone: .
<{Leam'r understand tt “One thing is settled: Captain Billy is only
good Tun, whsever it i.” caged!"
“ “He why should any one be on our track?"” a
“There is one thing you forget.” .
. “Well hat im th CHAPTER XI.
“ Weil, what we've got in the cage.’?
Fortent was adesperate fellow. Te was the real
gnant fléree too ta mn Fortuni’s face grew more ma- | 1 ir or cho forgers, He was really @ Corsican
Can that bet @ may who cared littie atout rewoving an, enem
t girikes me that there is where the trouble from bis path with me dagger he fel-
tin aly ans ‘and when driven
Hon ‘there, be nnd deified to the United Sta
Hie bad gone West, and had been for a time with na
ang of horse thieves.. Later, he hiad been en:
CHAPTER
at {talian listened, with leaning eves and ct
ly working feature, and when the narrative
oleys singular adventares was conctuded, the
Htalian, in a musing
theitt and, like many a mia ofbisebaracter, had bis
rol
orgauitzed the forging gan, jess spend-
Indeed, ‘it was his romance 1 that m
He had fallen in love with a beauti-
a sd sce hate? ful Comicnn gir Bhe did nol ove him; her affee-
«We mant another bird In onr cage.” tions were already bestowed when shé first met
« Another bird in our cage?” Fortan) at a festival. The man sought to win her,
«Yes. . She refused to have anything to do with him. Hie
“Ten catch on.” wore revenge, and disappeared. Time went on.
“The ¢ beautiful girl married the man of her choice—
we ee ae a young lawyer—and time a lovely dangh-
‘Eby T forgot, you don't remember. I'l tell ter came to bless them. But the hour of joy was
yon: Joyce hi followed by an hour-of terror and disaster. The
TT koows a lack young husband and father remained away. {rom
“Yes; a little de ‘evil, “He knows @ heap.”” home one night until late, |The wife fe amatied him
“« "io tell th wen she heard a ste jer hus
one toelart Toa aagrnell me the boy has got some | jan ashomaiked the inte path | ‘Rading to the
“Noo? froot door of is cotton fe ran to meet
“Wl bir. he the ek, As she did so, she
“ cites i aig” Pe cereale, Beaw; oARSE ESS
ce finat tnd! wife sot upa ita geri ae cries and screams,
“ Yes, that lad. He is one of the smartest chaps | The nelghbore rai . The dead
ever born. - He is at the bottom: of the whole busi- man was ad carried It into bs fone, ‘and the whispered
ness,” 98 PASSE ”
“T thought be had gone West.””
“Ob, yes; but it appears he is in town.”
Foley langhed, and said:
“Tf it’s only a boy, I had no right to scare.”
‘] fear that boy more than any man in the world,
He fs like'a streak of Hightning—an electric spark;
you. can never track bin
“tho you mean to tell me that it was the boy who
baunted me
hat’s what Pn telling you.”
NEETSO,? ”
“lve truce
“Pat Y Bed nat see the boy.” ,
“You did not?”
“om
“That's not strange, Tle isa transformer. Hes |
against the deck. . There is one thiug we've got to
at is that?”
“ “Shall Topeak plains”
Ses oo
tatian went down and drew forth a long,
nals looking pont ai
“Pat thls through bi ‘bin, “That's n do to
boy imoro than | doa any mortal
COhat he's done a e sirendy." He's played
with you aries your own * “shi
“But was it the boy?
“The bos, anda Gna ele.”
“Lean not believe it, Fortar
atTkrow I'd rather have 8
Z thought ti bo
ew ¥
ni.”
qouen secret special
boy had gone ‘Fost,
. tat ss game?”
“fe is in to ran down the murderer of Billy
yen.
Bi
dead.”
9 men were talking—
an from our description of the place ou Reaers
an guess the locality —a whisper passed:
“There fs only one thing for us to do.”
“What's that???
“Stop all operations, and all bands turn to and
down that boy.
“Do you mean to tell me the lad is 50 danger-
ous?”
“Td
Ww Si "gown bim easy enough.”
® You think so?” :
“yes
{You don't know; but it's all right.”
“ How?”
«There is on man can down him.”
Who je the man?”
“Tam.
am.
* Your?
Yes.”
“ You had better start right in.7?
“Twill; and 3 1 tell yoo, all things must stand
mntil we get rid of
“I's tough.”
“We can not do anything else.”
“ pad you think so much of the lad?"
do, And now let's arrange a vlan, Te ison
cure ”
Jeno it neems, ff it fe the kid.”
“Tris the kid.”
‘Then he seein to be on my track.”
“ “He downed ees cuore time.”
‘He can not down me." .
“ he ae mu bees mae
You iniok ‘pe will follow mo up?”
“Sure.”
‘hat is his purpose working the ‘blu?
vat
“He has @ purpose,”
© What is it?”
‘Fle wants to scare you,”
Seare me?”
Soo the lad who never gets canght, Fortuni fs my
man.”
Tatar a Recon sorrow fol: apon the mother, as a
discovary was made hick will be detailed as our
—a terrible
pa incident, which will
ave a dec ring upon the ° thrilling tneldents
en it Srl be our duty to record
as stated, Archie overheard every word that
between Foley and Fortunl. He heard
Foruunt promise to down his poniard
ith which the deed eas tobe mosand hemmed.
Fortuni y wa 8 desperate man; “put Archie was &
he seed Intelligence—an in-
tegen ‘and ficuteness that led. him to smile as
bis eyes rested upon the weapon wit which he was
g oie execnte if the wretch Fortuni carried out
6 6c!
tube lad orerheard some further talk between the
tuen sam Poles depart) and hho tet
ie e0, baving mado up hisnstd 10 follow Fortuni
and josth ina wim ‘illite.
TE thet 1@ thing in which oor little hero
alighted, {tvas in surprises: s; It had become a Das-
jon or @ mania with him, avd bo was glad that his
‘Tho lad toy Oroiind for a long, time-fully two
hours—and then he saw Fara teave the house,
The lad let him go, He determined to find out
pomathing 8 5.10. the inmates "ot the house, He
Knew whei ol was to meet the man Foley.
Het Rew the hou when the tw
‘AS Aware that he had ‘per enty, rot ‘Gmet to
Stuy the house and still be gn hand at the tryst,
The lad followed the Corsi some distance, to
make sure as to tho none course. iTo saw him
walk: to the city Hine and take & car that ran to the
New York ferry, and then ie returned to the house,
bar ocd ae disguise for
pear to pay any attention to him
heard’a voice. Fhe Foie came from the door
way of the cottage, and at that Tnstant the old
woman glanced at Archie, and then: she came
to a balt, In the door-way of the cottage stood
most beautiful girl of fifteen or sixtee
deed, the youth ae ie first glance decided thot
she was the most beautiful creature his oyes
“The lad stood spel-bourd aud entranced, and
be heard the gir i the old Woman, and ask,
speaking in Englist
‘How long will you be gone?”
“ Abont an honr."? .
«Gan Figo with your”
The old woman spoke in @ quick, nervous tone
and Archie walked on, He did ict wish the od
Woman to notice that he had observed what
Our little hero was got ep a @ ragged little
irl, and was not an ob; eer oe appeared at that
instant, ¢aleulated to attract nach attention,
‘ld woman walked on, and 20 did. Archie,
path which led over
Flere he tnened aside,
0 passed on to the Village, about
bait a mile data te
1 until the woman had passed
a be retraced his
wall on foward “tho village, when
steps and appeared at the coltage. He walked up
the path to the door ot the eottage aud knocked,
“Will you give me something to eatt”” he asked,
as the git pec the doo
“The girl looked him orer. She wore a plain cat
ico ‘dress, Dat as our he ero approached closer to her,
he Ras tore re aud more struck by her wondrous
beau
‘Ave you baugry?” asked tho girl in @ volee de-
nightly lease and musi
um huvgry.””
sorry. All i can give you is a few crack-
em
You are vers kind.”
« Ob, I wish (had something more to give you'"”
“ on mt be glad to eat the crackers,” came the
ans
bo crackers were given, and Archle commenced
jo eat, and asked:
‘0ts'this your bome?”
« You must go away now,” said the girl,
«Was that your mother?”
“Tean not answer any more questions.”
“Answer me one question, Is your father
wee?
Archie only asked the question as an indirec
query in order to learn if the man Fortuni was ‘ie
gitl’s father. He bad bis suspicions. Fortuni’s
eyes were black as an East Indian's; the girl's were
azure biue,
“T can not talk,” sald the girl
“You might anbwer me that question.”
Why should 1”
“ Because [ have no father or mother, and 1 want
to know that ba you are baypy and have Both.”
ova 4 Interest you?”
dy happy, even though I
“Tain real sorey or yom" said the girl.
‘How long have you lived heret”?
“Why do
“ Aul Fused to live a Jong, ray from here,”
“T have lived he le.”
re a
“ tig such a lovely place, and you look so happy.
Your father must be be very kind 2 you.” py
srt have neither father mor mother,” said the
girl, in a Tow, sad to
HAPTER XII,
AVz have sald there was sadness in tho g's
tones as she spoke. ‘There was more—there Was a
strain of fear and terror, and she looked around
furtively as she made the admission, and it ap-
Prated, to have come involuntarily, and she sald
immediately afterward:
“Now go away,” and she slammed the door in
or hero’s 5 tace,
‘Archie turned and walked away, a gliiter in his
exes and a sinile upon bis face, and he mattered:
“That was well done; but ™ 80
gueett | But she is not ughter. I
thought 30. She does not look like him; and that
old, ugly faced woman is not her mother. But who
285
Re
st
‘wron;
solve that mystery.
Twi
"And one thing | aan very lad
of; I may, to savé my own life, be compelled to kill
Fortani, °I will not lot him kill me: and if T do
‘down bim,’1 do not make that’ beautiful girl ai
orphat ‘ill again, I will neal
‘Anshle went off into an old, deserted building,
and changed his clothes. ‘He put his bundle ina
safe place, He thought he might have occasion for
the sume disguise at some future time, and he left
it where it would be handy.
Having worked bis transform; t the lad came forth
and walked along dow1 toward the city
fino, Intending to take the ears. Ho had not pre.
ceeded far, however, before a man came up to him
and said:
{Halloot Where dia you come trom?”
‘Thom the place to whlch fam going,” was the
lad’s answer.
‘That wou’t do, I want a straight answer.”
ayen et
* whi ‘hat right have you to ask me questions, any-
7 want you to give an account of yourself.”
“#'¥ou do3”
oh Wis Bre yours no oy
&N ‘am. I've asked you @ ques:
tion; I want you te answer it.”
«Fam not answering questions to strangers.”
“Oh, you're noi
” No, sir.
Reckon
“Treckon
F You, won't
‘Then you will take @ walk with me.”
“Pw
«You wit
“Where to”
“The station: house, ”
“7 guess not.”
“I don’teare ‘what you guess, ‘That's what you'll
iret vill suswer my questions.”
won't
“ i re you an officer?*
* Tt does not matter me Tam.
account of yourself or go with me."
“J can give an aceouat of mm pelt ”
&; Where did you come from?
’* New Yor!
«Where are you going?”
“To New York.”
(You will give an
ta ot Vat i is your name?”
“ ste hat is Soar business?”
2 YCjaculated the querist, a look of sar
prises malting his face.
“Some folks claim to be gentlemen; I claim to be
a loales tam a Poot. hike to study nature.
Some folks say I am eraz T like to be
salted eragy, Tam @ mini trent. ‘Tike to read
other people's minds. It's zrvcablo gift.
You learn so mach that you should not know,
learn to have #0 much contempt for other people.
But Tam (8 crank, don’t yoo see?”
ik Fou a
il ne something more in 8 C1
oAhy archeologist, an Earptolo;
gist, an ‘Satectang n esploes a fossilist. You see,
am a learned
{do vou iknow ‘what I think you are”
ike to kno
than a crank,”
You never see them
steal things when they ‘kuow any one is looking.””
Poult pe
os it; I am willin
have to ie ‘ine overnight.
“TL reckon we'll keep you overnight.”
© And foed me well?”
«We won't let you starve.”
Good enough, old mant. I am with you,
but if I go, you wilt
Ian
alm with a man who Will lodge and feed mi
sratis.”
‘oflcer was both hered, The man
ofteee in citizen's clothes, ot regular
Getective, but siuply temporaniy on special duty,
‘There bad been ny toe saeak robberies in tho
heighbortiood, and several patroimen bad been do-
tailed t to special work. The officer had not seen our
hero go into the old house, but he had seen him
come forth, and he bad questioned bimn as has been
ara go ith said A
The oflicer hesitaiea,” Ie feared, "eter all that
he migot Invi 8 langh on himself if be “took in
@ reaily bi idiot.
titre Jou Os your way to Now Yorke"
«Yes; but now I've accepted your very kind in-
vitation.
ale ie axe pon 4n, you'll be locked up, friend."
Will I? Oht won't that be os cet be
ww experience. “Come, let's
«Yon 287 yori tive in New mr
‘I live just wl » 1
statlon-houye for aw winigsP owe PHL ty It in the
“Tdon't know whether you will or not. Come,
yon moon
wi Moose
“Clear Now York, Go to thunder!”
“Xhr a streak ot Henin. ”
‘The officer was mad. Te made up his mi:
the fad Was neither a thiet nor s crank, Pata ease me
et square. “He deterinloed to provoke the joker
into saying something sufliclently impudent that
ronda serve as an excuse for giving him agood ear-
fing, an n
‘ol're a smart Alec, I gee. You talk too much
with i your mouth, Now go.”
hander and streak ot Mehtntg?
“You moosey on a Fons or Pl hung you."
“ You mean we'll have'a run in, eh? Well, now,
Pia I think you're a fool, You don’t know your
snes,
‘The officer made @ rush at Archie, and the next
tnatan went ero down a steep’ embankment,
yrbien the two had stood while the talk related
was in
ab de continued in our next.)
“Old Sleuth” writes exclusively for The
‘New York Fireside Companion,
—
NOTHING TO WEAR,
1M MASSON.
“Norma to wear, my darling, nothing at all to
wear”.
This fe the song she sings to him and fills him with
ir.
When ce ut to toll each day and earn thelr
She bangs aro
aro gai
And when x ‘comes home late at night she sits upon
he stair,
And warbles ott, “ You know, dear Charles, I haven't
a thing to wear.
ho palgnaine Cad Jat year, T tll you, isa sights.
oy old black grenadine Is worse ‘makes me lool
My black sik isso shiny, gud I feel go mortified:
And then, for. ‘mer, T'inust have something fa
white ay
And 49 ste sings her little song throughout the live.
long day
© Nothing t9 Wear, my darling, nothing tofwear. T say."
nid Charles ig at tho offs, and his face is bianchea
wit
Because be ‘cath not pay for all the things she got last
—The Cloak Review,
und his weary neck until these words
HUMOROUS DRIFT.
VIRESIDE FANCIES.
PRANK MARION.
A THonovoH coop-er—a setting hen.~
Srectes of loan fishermen—pawabrokers,
10g’s jaws.
Fars are often high, money-wise and otherwise,
Have a regular “ snap "—a bull
A“ srmikixo." costume—tights and boxing-gloves.
‘Taorovon break-men—Jay Gould and Russell Sage.
am.
“ You'nx fair to look upon,” he sai,
Tom women calm god inte
“May Task your age!” "You may,” she sald;
‘ruron the shady side of fey."
Grxenatux good at “figures "fashionable dress-
makers, .
Orten.a wholesale dlechouse—a bullding where dyna-
mite is stored, '
Sourwaa * seated” but not aettled-the Bebrivg «
Sea coutroversy.
Die who are fond of having “ rents" in their gar-
ments—landlords.
a
Fee offered the maiden is heer, :
And eho refused five pose blank:
But changed her mind aod gaid " ee ia
‘When she learned he had cash in the bank.
Ir a dude has any ties in this world, they are certainly
nothing more than neck-ties.
Xo dlctiooary cam equal a chit’ deition of chaoe:
og Satoanyy ge tama sluts dameten of engon:
> His Heanixos.—An item: “ By a recent ft
Jones the: Ashemarke ian, Jost nearly all his stock it
teade but bie Herring's sate,
\P THY, TROUBLE
© War 43 ‘you look so down igo mau mouthe"
We girl. “In truth,
sald, Shiai bing ing me,
‘a confounded aching tooth.”
Master (fond of using slang)—“ Well,
nd that, sour wite presented you with
celts” Ye've beea mmusintormed,
Pave Reriy
Par,
in ‘to night,”
.@ Billy
Brows'a Messacr Ware. —Jones (tg his friond
Brown, for whom he wis about to act ‘second in a duel)
wqaktonn, supbese you should fall {this unfortunate
affair. mae shai el 70 Brown—Tell her
that all is over between
aepleyg. Git Hae Nave ror. 4 Bosz,—Agont (at the
Madame, I would like to take your zal
fest of President Harrison," Dilerate henseete Ga
Ip) —" Well, you can't haveiit." (aside) Morey! 1 never
Knew before that presidents ever went on a bust.”
rar SHE DUDES Sux.
girls say thor
reve someting about ue thet sour fepeles
‘ou, these lassies don’t mean what they say;
‘They're like Patti's farewells.
orem Wasven.— Rarber (wrathfully tugging at his
ay ‘in, Maria f you can't keep U ite Buttons
onmy shirts, Til get a divored.” Wite (
tig: there's no U6e of ou trying to temas
Sim dina inate, ou ex can't do it for a cent; 0 your jingo-
ism is wast
ounny’t Give In Away.—Finnegan (to grocer)
«Phra the beet yell do ou twlaty pounds of sugar?
Grocer (in confidential way)" T'll make the price four
and 4 half pound to you, if you won't give it
inks "means the sugar)
igabe, thine au" OF'l wok give i away, for Of wane
it meseit.”
How Mucu. Naanye Trey Werk. —She (to dilatory
George, It doean’t seem to im
Jover)— e that we're a bie
@ year azo.”
I es She—" How so?”
of didn't have a blamned cent-and
now I've got a half @ dollar saved up toward paying the
minister for marrying us.""
Sogiery ta ike baftoo
with laughter swells
me Shik ow easily men are caught
. hher setting caps and belles
A Mencuanr's Test.—Merchant (who has a
\vertised
to tenth appli
po" Well my. hale nan,
eat" Tenth,
2
tion I offer, as you are t)
it that has told the truth,
MoCantv's Saanp Trape.—MeCarty (to butcher)
“ How m of carn bate?” Butel
(throwing {t upon les)—"" That, sir, weighs
ten pounds, and 1 shall hye to charge your our aad &
hat und for it MeCargy (with @ shrew
thin, 8), OF pot pay i Ori give
a alt a doblar for the bull pice, and not another
dom elat'™. Butcher (with eoemboo sett ee All
Hight, Be. McCarty. Seeia’ i's you, you may bave ft.
HOW PATRICK FIGURED IT.
b
Satp 8 master to his servant: “Do you understand the-
‘ology?
‘k; “Oi have niver been
to cology,
“Then half Four lite is Jost,” said the master, with «
laugh.
“Then O}nl do me best,” said Patrick, “to live the
ozo understand estrolony 2"
th Yat agen
Ra halt your life fs lost.” “* Ah‘ said Patrick,
‘Then 0 must be a dead man, since Oi have lost the
ee
joker, and he made up his mind on the moment to